It’s hard to overstate how obscene the 2025 Corvette ZR1 really is. And this from a car guy that wasn’t impressed with the C8 Corvette when it landed. From a DESIGN perspective. Obviously it’s a staggering achievement of automotive engineering. But, it looks weird and, me no likey.

Subjective styling whining aside, hot damn, the ZR1 is RIGHTEOUS. It’s rocking the 5.5L flat-plane V8 out of the Z06 but comes strapped with a pair of fat turbos. Chevy calls it the Gemini LT7 and says it makes 1,064 horsepower and 828 torques. I call it Gimme and say Take My Money.

It’ll crack 200, it’ll probably go 0-60 faster than you can read this attempt at creative car prose. BUT, most importantly, those turbos get as hot as a NASA space shuttle on re-entry when at full suck and can inhale enough air to fill an Olympic-sized swimming pool in just 4 minutes! So says Chevy anyway.

I love a bit of hyperbole, but not as much as I love this winged wonder, this modern masterpiece, this absolute rocket. The front rotors are 15.7 inches across, which is like, pretty big man. In just 24.5 seconds, the Corvette ZR1 is said to go from 80 mph to 200 mph and back to 80. I have trouble wrapping my head around this odd fact.

But I would like to test said metric as I’m confident I COULD wrap my head around it. Would I mortgage the house for one? I like to pretend so, but no. I’m not THAT crazy. Would I give a chunk of my left thumb to drive one? The last time I removed that chunk, I passed out on the floor because I’m a 6-foot-tall baby. But yeah, I would.

Want more ZR1? Check out the long-form look at ye olde King of the Hill over on Substack.